Enlightenment, or: Contradiction, Unsettled

"Enlightenment, or: Contradiction, Unsettled"
by Amanda Kay Holstien, Sr.

Cheyenne, kombucha
& natural cigarettes;
acid & yoga:
am I enlightened yet?
Meditate when I'm angry
& smoke when I'm sad;
it's hard 2 b a woman
w/so many guys named Chad.

I found a razor in an ashtray
on the Upper East Side;
all my friends are snorting snow,
and I'm trying
to keep
my stride.

Still though,
I know
not necessarily
does every
truth
have a rhyme
or rhythm
or calming effect.

Life is form, unhinged:
I am a flower blossoming
after being
plucked.
Both flourishing
& degrading:
fasting,
but not to be thin.
Or maybe thinness second,
Enlightenment first;
thinness, a happy accident.

One foot in my body,
a twitch in my third eye,
let's roll another doobie,
& pray we get real high,
like the first time.

Still I try
to find
my intuition,
only
to find
life, a contradiction,
unsettled.